Band-Aids and Amputated Arms

I find when any of my offspring complain about teachers that, as an adult, it's my duty to defend the teacher's actions as it's generally in the child's best interest. "Teachers know what's best for you." However, I found I just couldn't understand what possessed a certain teacher of Princess Shannon this week.

The night before, Shannon was told she had to get a book cover for her textbook. As we now live in the "Age of Green", we don't usually have excess paper bags hanging around the house any longer. So I suggested she use newspaper. Comics procured from the recycle bin - book wrapped and taped accordingly - Project Book Cover: Done. Not so fast.

Shannon relayed that her Spanish teacher saw her comic-covered book while she visited her locker, and proceeded to have a complete fit.

"What is that?" asked Concerned Teacher.

"What?" wondered Shannon.

Concerned Teacher pointed to textbook. "That, on your book?"

"It's my book cover," she answered confused.

"Why in the world would you use newspaper to cover your book? It's like putting a Band-Aid on an amputated arm. It'll never do."

Shannon explained that we don't have paper bags in the house, and then showed the teacher another book, which was also covered with newspaper. "I covered this book at the beginning of the school year." This was six months ago. Pretty sure a Band-Aid wouldn't hold up for six months on an amputated arm.

At this, Concerned Teacher snatched the book away from her and walked away without a word - leaving Shannon in a state of panic as to whether she was going to get the book back before her Social Studies class began.

An hour later, a fellow student came into Shannon's class and handed her the book - with the comics covered entirely with masking tape. The student then wagged her finger at Shannon and said, "Concerned Teacher says, 'Now don't let a thing TOUCH THIS, OR ELSE.'" 

Now I could see that perhaps the teacher didn't believe newspaper was a suitable cover, but why not send the student home with the book to take care of it herself? When I saw what must have been a half a roll of masking tape on the book, I laughed and had to agree with my children that sometimes teachers might just be a little insane. Ah, hell... they're only human.